December 12 - My side of the story
Entry by: Paul
Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa. You've got to hear my side of the story. First of all, Mr. Myers (Our way cool homeroom teacher) DID tell me to tast test the food. I just got carried away a bit. It was goood. And second of all, we had 60 snowballs, and you laid there for 127 minutes and 36 seconds. (Me and Jamie had a stopwatch.) And me and Jamie dont call it, "The Snowball Slaughter" anymore. No. We call it, "The Epic Super Snowball Slaughter of 'Specially Scrawny Nerb" Has a nice ring to it, doesn't it? So that's pretty much it. Paul, out!
December 6 - The Snowball Slaughter (A True Christmas Story)
Well it's the Holiday Season and I thought I would tell you guys a story that happened around in 5th grade. Well it was the final day of school before Christmas Break. (How I was so sad I had to leave). The teachers had invited me to have croissants, Christmas cookies, and apple cider before we left for a break, They had asked me to clean up the Teachers' Lounge before the party but this didn't bother me, since I was honored with the invitation. So, I use my Teachers' Lounge key (awarded to me after I received several academic awards) so I could dust the place I bit before the party. And as I opened the door, there I saw him. Paul had ate every one of the croissants and Christmas cookies and drank every ounce of apple cider. He tried telling me that the teachers had let him inside so he could "taste-test" the food but I didn't buy it one bit. I rushed to the nearest teacher and told her about the catastrophe that had occured. Soon enough Mrs. Landley (the secretary and close friend of mine) called Paul's parents. But that wasn't the end. A few days before Christmas Break ended I was taking a stroll in the neigborhood when...FLING! Paul and Jamie were throwing snowballs at me like their was no tommorow. After about 50 snowballs were thrown at me they finally stopped. I layed their for about 90 minutes until my parents came. I had many bruises from the event me, Jamie, and Paul like to call "The Snowball Slaughter." And so ends a confusing Christmas story.
November 22? I dunno, something like that.
Entry by: Paul
Wow Nerb. You are a serious nerd. You didn't go trick-or-treating? You're such a dork. We had 300 water balloons filled to the brim ready for you. I wanted to give a an early Christmas present. Well, anyway, Jamie and I went threw neighborhoods. I GOT 12 POUNDS OF CANDY! Unfortunately, I'm already down to 4. Uh-oh. Well, no big deal. This past month or so was just candy candy candy. Yeah, my favorite type of candy is Twix or Take 5. But it angers me that only like one guy in all four neighborhoods was handing out Take 5's! What crap! It's the greatest candy ever, start handing it out more often! I'd really appreciate it. So, I guess that's all. See ya later!
October 5 - My Halloween Plans
Entry By: Nerb Gecner
Even though Halloween is apon us, I refuse to go Trick-Or-Treating. Its is just silly to dress up just to get candy. Plus this teenager named Joe Prink who just happens to be Paul's cousin, always sprays us with water guns! 1 year he got all his friends together to hunt and shoot us! So Me, Melvin, and the other geeks plan to play "Political Conquest" until the unfortunate time of of Trick-Or-Treating ends. But if we do end up Trick-Or-Treating we will be sure to tell you. Also we will make a special route so we never see Joe, Paul, or Jamie. Well that is all for now.
Breaking News! (9/22/08)
Entry By: Paul
I can't believe it actually worked! We've got footage of the teachers from last Thursday. Me and Jamie are still working on editing it but we'll try to get the video up on the website by October 12th. Yeah, you're just gonna have to wait until then. And Nerb, I got you a new Tony Gwynn card... not. Yeah you probably don't even know who Tony Gwynn is do you?
Entry By: Nerb Gecner
Hello everyone. This diary entry will be a responce to Paul. Well, I just can't believe you Paul! My autographed Tony Gywn Card cost me a lot of money and I was going to save it for the future when it would be more valubale! And your little scheme will not be tolerated. I already alerted all the teachers to keep a look out for you. So ha! And using my little brother to snach it for you was even worse! And he took the 100 dollars you gave me and bought the new GameDrome 5! He won't even let me play on it! But anyway, I'm sure you'll think of some way of getting into the teacher's lounge so I give up. Respecting the authorities is no use when you are around.
Great Idea (8/24/08)
Entry by: Paul
So me and Jamie were kickin' back after playin' a little one on one in my driveway, and Jamie started to wonder what it was like in the teachers lounge during the day. So at first we were just imagining things that the teachers do in the teachers lounge and so on. But then I thought, "Hey, what if we set up a camera before school in the teachers lounge?" And then Jamie told me about this new video camera he saw online that could record 20 straight hours of footage without running out of batteries. Unfortunately, it cost $1900. Yeah but by selling Nerb's autographed Tony Gwynn baseball card we got $2000. Hey, what do you expect? The guy's a hall of famer. So anyway we were nice enough to give Nerb the leftover $100. Yeah aren't we kind? Well now we just have to wait for school to start, so I'll post results then.
Prank Lessons (8/17/08)
Entry by: Paul
Hey guys, hey dorkface, what's up? Yeah just to let you know, your little bro is learning the art of the prank from the best for only 10 cents a class, haha! Yeah, so he's got it all figured out. He knows things about you that you didn't even know I knew. So don't think just 'cuz he's in elementary school that he doesn't know every mismove you make at the middle school. He's so much cooler than you, even if he is only 9. Yeah so later dudes!
August 14 - Tommy's Birthday
By: Nerb Gecner
To start off our brand new set of Diary Entries I would like to tell you about my brother's 9th Birthday. My brother is sadly not a nerd like my dad and I and has inherited his popularity from my mother. I mention this because hundreds of classmates wanted to go to his birthday party. Only 9 of his best friends came. His friends then plotted a prank on me to give themselves laughs. Which worked. I then found out that the theme of the party was actually pulling pranks on me. Then I went to my clubhouse with my geek buddies, Melvin and Carlton to take cover. But when we came out, Tommy and his friends hit us with water balloons which was even more painful then Anne Weako's punches. Finally his birthday party ended at 5:00 and I could finally relax but Tommy put super glue on one of my clubhouse chairs and I had to take of my pants and run across my backyard, pantless while Tommy took pictures and then e-mailed them to everyone at K.B Anderson Middle School and everyone at his elementary school, K.B Anderson Elementary. Well that was Tommy's birthday party and we can just hope and wait that his 10th birthday party won't be as bad.
All contents of Nerb's Diary are completely fictional and are made-up from the minds of The ComixBros Inc.